by Karen Justice | Jan 17, 2024 | Ramblings
Desperation makes us do strange things.
I needed a blog topic.
My head is a million miles away.
An empty glass with an orange is at my elbow.
Here goes.
The orange in a glass is a circle within a circle.
The colors of the glass and the orange are opposing colors on a color wheel.
The inside of an orange looks a bit like a wheel.
Cut it in half and it’s a smile.
Smiles are infectious, but also cultural.
Americans smile at each other on the street.
Many other cultures do not even look each other in the eye on the street.
The word “street” was brought to England by the Romans.
A street was a paved way, but a road was simply a well-used option for traveling in the Middle Ages.
Greeks originally built roads so they could more easily move their armies, but they didn’t move oranges.
Ancient Mediterranean societies had no oranges.
Sweet oranges originated in southeast Asia in the third or fourth century B.C.
Sweet oranges are a cross of mandarins and pomelos.
Rolling through history and countries, oranges of some sort arrived in Europe with the Arabs in the early 8th century.
Via roads and streets, they were carried to the royal courts.
They eventually traveled to the Americas with rich colonists.
My orange traveled from Wegmans to my kitchen to my glass
– to my blog.
by Karen Justice | Oct 10, 2023 | Travel
I had a meal in a small room on the eastern side of Kenya with the entire village of people. Or that’s what it seemed like to me.
As we parked under a tree next to the goat corral in front of a small cinder block home, people began streaming around the house’s corners. We were expecting to dine with the parents of our companion. We anticipated the challenge of not being able to communicate with two others over the meal. The reality became much different.
We dined on multiple dishes of food with 25-30 Kenyans all in a room measuring about 12’x12’. Men and women of all ages and two adorable young girls sat on sofas, chairs, benches, plastic lawn chairs, and stools.
Fewer than half of us could speak or understand English. We could only share food, smiles, and handshakes, plus the one important Swahili word I had learned, “asante.” I repeated that expression of thanks quite frequently over the next nine days.
(A few of the group are pictured here.)
Some background before I continue.
My life partner and I traveled to Kenya with board members of Clean Water Kenya. One of our objectives was to observe how the program was operating and the level of success to date. Most of us had also not yet met the in-country coordinator or the others involved in the program.
As a small NGO, Clean Water Kenya (CWK) our coordinator volunteers on the side of his regular job as a guide, yet he has worked miracles. We spent three days traveling with him, his wife, and his two-year-old daughter.
How The Trip Began
Before the intimate meal with two and a half dozen Kenyans, we had visited four primary schools in the local Kampo tribal villages. The students in uniforms of varying types all came out to meet us. Each school had some special greeting or performance. Of the families they represented, 33%-75% had one of our water filters in their homes. The others were still living with impure and dirty water. The schools, however, all had our filters. At least during school hours, the children had healthy water.
Both at the intimate meal and in two of the schools, we also drank the filtered water. I was impressed with its clarity and good taste. Doctors in the two clinics we visited told us their patients’ problems were decreasing as the number of provided water filters increased.
On Day 2, the team had a crowded visit to the factory outside of Nairobi where the filters are made. Such a simple process that provides amazing success. Basically, they are clay pots dipped in a colloidal silver solution and inserted into a larger vessel. Like the home we visited, the space was also small and packed.
Intimate With Thousands
Our third day in Kenya, was outdoors and shared with 2,500 Maasai. Yet, it still felt intimate.
We were outsiders included in a tribal conclave with political issue speeches, dances, games, and singing. A young girl reminding me of a young Amanda Gorman read a poem she’d written about female genital mutilation, FGM. A very intimate subject, an illegal practice, yet still done. About half of the speeches were interpreted, so we were somewhat able to keep up with the program.
Clean Water Kenya has provided over 1,100 water filters to the Maasai to the west of Nairobi. That day, we delivered another 100. As a tribute of their gratitude for our ongoing contributions, the Maasai inducted our co-founders into their tribe as elders. As board members, we were also recognized, adorned, and gifted.
At one point in the day, I was sitting elbow-to-elbow with the locally elected member of parliament. However, my most intimate moment was standing face-to-face with a girl of eleven or twelve. She had walked up to me and put a bracelet on my wrist. Drawing on my new vocabulary, I said, “Asante.” She did not answer. There was no expression on her face or in her eyes. She just stood in front of me studying my face. It seemed like we stood there for five minutes, but it was probably only one or two. I perceived merely curiosity and wonderment. Perhaps she’d never seen anyone like me before. Then she was gone or I got pulled away. I don’t remember how it ended, but I’ll always remember her face.
Off To The Wilds
When our CWK visit ended, my partner and I took advantage of the proximity of the Maasai Mara. It’s one of the most prolific safari areas on the continent, a not to be missed opportunity.
Because of its popularity, vehicles full of people are a common site in the wild. That sounds illogical, but it really is wild. I wouldn’t dare have exited that steel frame on wheels attached to an engine that could whisk us out of danger. It seemed safe at the time as long as I didn’t consider the speed of the big cats. It was also reassuring to note they had an abundant source of their usual diet.
The animals’ habituation to the strange creatures in rumbling boxes allowed us to get much closer to them than I expected. There is an intimacy in watching a female cheetah protect her kits for two days and then walk with them among the vehicles the next. To me, it indicated her trust and an understanding of our respect.
There was also a scary intimacy in watching two lions tear apart a buffalo that had been killed the night before. You don’t just walk into someone’s home and stand watching the family eat a meal. Yet, that’s what we were doing.
As we left the Mara on our way to a small airstrip, our guide stopped to talk with various people in the village we passed through. The faces, the laughter, the gestures, and the circumstances gave us yet another glimpse into life in rural Kenya. An intimacy with the people.
That is the reward of travel. Seeing the sites is educational. Engaging with the people and their lives is rewarding. The Kenyans we met were welcoming, gracious, and generous.
by Karen Justice | Aug 2, 2023 | Widowhood
The question about one’s summer activities was often the “ice breaker” as we returned to school. Perhaps it was the exercise in a high school speech class or an elementary school language lesson. In adulthood, it’s a watercooler conversation or dozens of Facebook and Instagram posts.
My summer posting thread was a bit unique. There may be some professions that share my focus. There may be families wading their way through the same thing during these hot months. However, very few can share my statement. “I spent much of my summer studying and thinking about widows.”
Women In Black And White
Two friends and I are writing a book about being a widow. Therefore, I’ve spent many hours talking with widows, observing widows, and researching widows. I’ve spent time supporting widows.
I’ve talked to them in coffee shops, over lunch, on a tour in Italy. We’ve talked over the phone and in emails or through Facebook posts.
Although widows in the Euro-American traditions usually clad themselves in black, widows in Morocco wear white. Yet, there really is no distinct black or white to being widowed.
Through our experiences and our studies, my co-authors and I have evidence to the seemingly obvious fact that every widow’s experience is unique. While there are similarities, there are definitely differences. Those differences are mostly found in the range, extent and intensity of emotions and experiences.
Supporting Widows
Through our book, we intend to support widows as they create and transition to their next life. We will also provide knowledgeable guidance to those who want and need to support a widow, especially during her first year of widowhood. But, support isn’t black and white either.
Search for the synonyms of the word “support” and you’ll find two dozen versions of the word. Support for a widow can mean you are: advocating, aiding, assisting, bearing, bolstering, bracing up, buoying up, bracing, caring for, carrying, championing, comforting, defending, encouraging, helping, holding, looking after, providing for, strengthening, subsidizing, supplementing, supporting, sustaining, or upholding.
You may perform multiple versions of that word and the ways in which you could to do so are diverse. We’re working on explaining them. Stay tuned. But, also stay aware of the unspoken needs of any widows in your life. Pay attention.
If you see nuances, if you have ideas, if you see a need, if you have something to share, please let me know. Email me at karen@karenjustice.us.
by Karen Justice | Apr 17, 2023 | Travel
Whenever I have lived or traveled in a foreign country, I believed it was necessary to learn some of the local language. But, oh my, the changes that requires in how our minds work! Language is a mental game. One that, for me, is challenging to master.
In my 20s, I lived in Germany and learned some “conversational” German. I knew enough to buy ski lift tickets, reserve a camping site over the phone, order a meal, shop the markets and be cordial to my neighbors. I had NO idea how much of that language would take root in my mind.
And Another 20 Years
Twenty years after living in Germany, we moved to Norway. Out of respect for my host country, I tried to learn and use a bit of Norwegian. I was totally shocked that my mind kept offering German words whenever I couldn’t remember the Norwegian words I wanted. I had no idea my limited German vocabulary had been living in the recesses of my mind for nearly two decades.
After another twenty years of life, I began working on another language. For several reasons, I started studying Spanish. Again, my mind kept filling in German words when the Spanish ones wouldn’t come fast enough. Evidently latent languages in our minds don’t give up easily, especially those we learn early in life.
Learn Early!
I really admire people who can speak several languages fluently. My mind won’t change gears that easily. Perhaps the key to the success that others have is that they start speaking multiple languages in childhood.
I’m headed to a couple French speaking countries for my next trips. “Oh, mon! Confusion multiple.” As easy as that translation is, maybe my secret to speaking French is to just move my adjectives to the other side of the nouns and work on a French accent. Then, perhaps I could communicate.
“Mais non!”
I foresee more mental exercise and the need to change my mind again – at least for a short while. (I wonder how I’m going to smother those German words.)
by Karen Justice | Feb 14, 2023 | Ramblings
Yes, this month there’s a focus on Valentine’s Day. However, it’s also “American Heart Month” with a big focus on cardiovascular health.
Is there a reason the symbol for Valentine’s Day is a stylized representation of the shape of our hearts? Is the dual February focus on hearts a convenience of that image? Is there a separation of the emotional and physical definitions of “heart?”
Maybe. Maybe not.
Throughout February, the American Heart Association‘s “Heart to Heart: Why Losing One Woman Is Too Many” campaign will raise awareness about how 1 in 3 women are diagnosed with heart disease annually.
The Centers for Disease Control is encouraging and empowering Black adults to reduce their risks for cardiovascular disease (CVD). Black adults in the United States die from heart disease at a rate two times higher than White adults. (From my little podium, it seems to be just one more advantage for white males!)
How is “Heart” defined?
Let’s get back to the issue of emotional and physical definitions of the heart. There’s a great article on Abbott’s website about the complex connections between our emotions and our cardiovascular system, especially our hearts. They say that “science already tells us there is no doubt that emotion impacts not only our mental health but also our physical well-being, especially that of the heart.” Our nerves and brains have a big influence on the functioning of our hearts.
There’s also that little phrase we use about “getting to the heart of the matter.” It’s an age-old saying emphasizing that the key to something’s existence is at the core.
Whether it’s a problem, a challenge, a game, a relationship or something else, we need to learn what makes it work, what makes it “tick”. Until then, we can’t knowledgeably address it.
Until we know the core of something, we can’t intelligently talk about it.
Until we know the core of a problem, we can’t solve it.
Likewise, until we know what is at our core, successfully creating goals and fulfilling dreams is difficult.
What is your heart’s desire?
A friend of mine was telling me today about their son-in-law who was a software engineer, but is now repairing and rebuilding historic furniture. The joy of doing so was at his core. It fulfilled him.
I know a former medical professional who is now a professional photographer. It’s more fulfilling.
I was once drooling over some handmade jewelry at a craft show and talking to the artist. He revealed that creating jewelry had been his hobby for 20 years during his dentistry career. He retired early because creating beauty gave him much more joy than health care. I’m sure he wasn’t making a dentist’s income on his products, but they were unique, beautiful and priced well enough to make a substantial addition to his retirement pay.
Get to the heart of it
When we are facing a change and trying to decide how we’re going to handle it, we are going to be much more successful when we take time to get to our core. What is it that takes our breath away? What would we rather be doing than anything else?
What drives you to do what you do?
Why are you where you are?
What would be the most satisfying outcome of the change you are facing?
Get to the core of your being and your thinking. Get to the heart of it.
Your emotions and your physical heart keep you healthy. Getting to the heart of any issue you are trying to solve will also keep you mentally healthy.
Take time for your heart in all aspects.